In a recent podcast, Ranbir Kapoor opened up about his marriage to Alia Bhatt and the complex relationship he had with his late father, Rishi Kapoor. "Especially when you’re in a marriage, you have to let go of your personality. She’s also letting go of her personality. We’re adjusting to each other to make it liveable for each other. Any marriage is doing that. You have to let go, you have to adjust, you have to sacrifice facets of it. It’s impossible for two people to like each other the way they are," Ranbir shared on Nikhil Kamath’s podcast WTF, painting a vivid picture of the compromises that define their love.
The Bollywood power couple, who tied the knot on April 14, 2022, after years of dating, have quickly become beloved figures both on and off the screen. Their intimate Mumbai wedding and the subsequent birth of their daughter, Raha Kapoor, in November of the same year, marked the beginning of a new chapter in their lives. The public got a heartwarming glimpse of their family during a Christmas 2023 photo shoot, where Ranbir and Alia proudly posed with their newborn.
Ranbir’s reflections didn’t stop at his marriage. He delved into his fraught relationship with his father, Rishi Kapoor, offering a raw and poignant look into his past. "I have never seen the colour of his eyes. I was extremely scared," Ranbir confessed, describing a childhood overshadowed by his father's volatile temper. Despite never raising a hand or shouting, Rishi's unpredictable moods cast a long shadow over his son’s early years.
“She (Alia) used to speak in a very loud tone. I think my father's tone, growing up, always rattled me. So she really made efforts to change that. And that's not easy when you've lived 30 years of your life speaking in a certain way. She's someone who instinctively reacts, like if Raha falls down, there's a reaction that throws me off. She makes certain efforts to put me at ease. I hope I could say there's something I did to put her at ease, but I don't think I've done it yet,” Ranbir said.
Ranbir recounted the turmoil at home, where his parents’ frequent arguments left him on edge. "Anybody who speaks in a louder tone, it disturbs me, since childhood. My parents went through a lot of fights. We lived in a bungalow, so I have spent most of my childhood on the staircases, hearing them fight. I was always scared and on the edge," he revealed, highlighting the profound impact these experiences had on him.
His mother, Neetu Kapoor, became his confidante, sharing her struggles during those turbulent times. "My mother used to talk about her feelings to me. But my father wasn’t that expressive. I never understood or heard his point of view," Ranbir said, shedding light on the emotional isolation he felt.
Despite the fear and distance, Ranbir acknowledged his father’s deep love for his family. "I believe my father was a short-tempered man, but he was a good man. He was somebody who loved his family, work, food, and alcohol. He was a very open person. He could speak up his mind," he said, capturing the complexity of Rishi’s character.
A significant turning point came when Rishi was diagnosed with cancer. Ranbir witnessed a transformation in his parents' relationship as his mother devoted herself to caring for his ailing father. "I saw the selfless service my mother was doing for him, and that kind of love was something which I probably at that time couldn’t have imagined," Ranbir reflected, acknowledging the profound impact of their renewed bond.
Ranbir also pondered the generational gap that influenced his father’s behavior. "I think that generation of men are scared of vulnerability. He never even expressed his love to me. He could never hold my hand. He did hug me, but it had more of a pat than a real hug," he explained, noting that while Rishi's love was evident, it was often shrouded in emotional distance.